Is Karma really a bitch?

My topic of choice today isn't exactly how I planned on starting my first blog.  I was all set to discuss a standout lesson I have discovered about life and the wonderful impact it had on me.  But today was a bad day.  My first instinct was to not share this information.  I had succumbed to the negative forces of the day and was ready to mask the fact with something seemingly more inspiring.  I realized this was a form of dishonesty and defeating the entire meaning of my blog concept.  And hey, that was a lesson in and of itself.

So onto the topic at hand.  Karma.  I found this word constantly creeping up and lingering on my mind throughout the day.  Was it really true?  Do people ultimately get what they deserve in life?  Are our actions really creating our fate?  Or is this just another brainchild our society came up with to tell people to make them feel better?  How many friends have we told this theory to after their boyfriend broke their heart?  Is karma just harmless thinking or a cop out to dealing with problems we can't control?

I probably should back up a bit.  As you may know most of the east coast was plummeted with snow this week.  My city of brotherly love alone received a record high 44" in just five days.  Unusual yes.  Unmanageable, slightly.  

By day I work as a glorified assistant and I'm good at my job.  The firm I work for was not in favor of closing for a snowstorm.  There were time sensitive issues to be dealt with and yes, we wanted to show our clients just how dedicated we are.  Yesterday was when the second round of heavy snow started.  Most employees showed up for work, with the exception of the more senior managers and associates.  They were working from home which caused an eruption of complaints from my peers.  They couldn't grasp the fact that they had to come in when their bosses did not.  More whining was happening than actual work.  I said nothing of the topic, as I feel they have earned their way to have those luxuries and as terrible as it may sound, the ones doing the complaining did not.  I view work similarly to the totem pole approach.  Unfortunately the lower you are, the more (for lack of a better word) shit you must deal with.  Eventually, they let us go home and I enjoyed the rest of the snow day.

That leads us to today. The snow had subsided early in the morning and the city was left to deal with what was left.  While most of the city was closed today, we had to come to work.  It sucked.  Of course I would have loved another snow day but I knew what I needed to do and only thought positively.  I put on my snow boots, bought donuts for my coworkers, and headed to the office.  I was the first to arrive and shortly after three more people trickled in.  We soon found out we were misinformed and we could have come in an hour and a half later.  It was upsetting and I vented, but I didn't let it bother me too much.  Then the calls started coming in, no one else would be coming in.  My bus or train is delayed or the sidewalks weren't shoveled were the main excuses.  And how was it that people that lived near subway stations or my neighborhood couldn't make it to our building?  Someone came in that lived 45 minutes from the city and it took another person 2 hours to get to the office, yet he did it.  I can honestly say if I did live further away I would have tried my best to show up.  Six people came in today.  

Maybe I am being too harsh or just ridiculous.  Maybe it was because no one else from my team showed and I had to carry all of their responsibilities today.  Or maybe it was because I felt unappreciated and that my supervisors didn't give a fuck.  Regardless, I was bitter.

I tried to turn my thoughts positive throughout the day but it wasn't working.  I was letting other people ruin my state of mind.  And that brings us back to karma.  I was using the promise of what karma brings to make me feel better.  I was boosting my self esteem while simultaneously having thoughts of karma working it's effect on my coworkers.  And it got me thinking, is karma really a bitch or am I?  

The workday ended as it always does and now that I am home again, these thoughts have subsided, much like an out of sight, out of mind effect.  I realize that a situation like this could happen again and I need to find a better tactic to deal with it.  Whether or not karma really does exist, thinking negatively about others will not have a progressive effect on me. 


I'm going to keep reflecting on this, and the meantime, I think I'll keep practicing yoga.