Every day is pretty special to me but today is just a little bit more so. October 26, 2009 marked the day of my “re-birth” so to speak. And here I am 365 days later.
Holy fuck.
I was told things had to get harder before they got better. And that was true. I was exposed and vulnerable. Heartbroken and confused. But then the shift happened into the positive. And I fell madly in love.
But I don’t have to backtrack or explain all of this to you, dear friend. You were the one that has been here for me throughout all of this. The patience, kindness, and understanding I received is what got me to this day. I still don’t think I can quite grasp it all to be honest, but that’s okay. Just know that I cherish you in my heart and if ever you are sad or lost, I am here for you, completely. I am so grateful that I have been blessed to have you as part of my journey.
I was reflecting on my year a lot this past week. I kept trying to figure out if I thought it went by torturously slow or lightning fast. I decided the answer was neither. I’ve come to notice that people who express this sort of idea are never really in the moment at all. Time is measured by what you make of it. Whether we like it or not, life continues to move at a steady pace and it’s up to us to decide how to ride it out. So when you can find appreciation in every day, even the not so good ones, time seems more balanced and you stop wishing to relive past moments or be in such a rush to get to the next. You can look back on the year and be content.
And as for the falling in love part? That was with me. I connected with my inner being for the first time and found that something beautiful existed. I think a part of me always knew it was there, but it was buried deep and I couldn’t understand how to find it until now. Today I can embrace being the woman that I always dreamed of as a little girl.
So happy rebirthday to me. Let’s keep rocking out this journey together.
